so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
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