Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
