Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
