I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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