Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
