she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
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