We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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