lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
Randomize
