How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
