i always forget guys have bellybuttons
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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