i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
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