Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize