Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
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