Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
Randomize
