Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
