I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
