I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
Randomize
