i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
Randomize
