I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
