can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
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