this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
My ATM looks so different sober.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Randomize
