My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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