im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Are my feet made of real feet?
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
