i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
Randomize
