You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Randomize