Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
You are a genius and a whore.
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