Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
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