ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
Randomize