My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
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