Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
We need to get me chipped asap
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
