I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Randomize
