Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Randomize