no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
