I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize
