Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
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