it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
