we have officially lost it.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Randomize
