Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Randomize
