We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
Randomize