You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
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