Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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