Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
