I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Randomize
