Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Randomize
