problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
40s are totally the cure
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Randomize
