she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize