he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
Randomize
