garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
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