if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
