I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize
