Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
Randomize
